motivation. its been a subject that has been swirling around our house for the last couple weeks like a leaf tossed in wind waiting for the perfect place to land. it has come up over dinner, after watching an inspiring photography live feed and then again last night in the last moments before sweet sleep there it was again. motivation. i have been wrestling with a few things for a while now, i can't say exactly how long, but i'm sure it's not as long as it feels. the wrestling has been something i would rather not face and therefore i find ways to ignore it or push it to the far reaches of my mind. it's not evil thought patterns or complicated logic, it's not what to buy my dear husband for Christmas although i do wrestle with that quite a bit, it's not how i am going to be an amazing mother to my boys. it's a couple gifts that i've been trying not to unwrap or even notice have arrived for me. how silly is that? who doesn't want to unwrap a gift